How to handle failure.
I often find myself thinking about the what if’s. What if this happens, what if I have homework, what if I don’t do my homework, what if I can’t train tomorrow, what if I get hurt tomorrow, what if I let everyone down, what if I can’t win this WOD. Etc and so on and so forth. I thought I was insane. (Maybe I am) but I think most people think the same things time to time. With those questions comes with the consequences. Sometimes failure is the consequence and you aren’t happy about that. Because no one likes to lose and that’s a fact. But how do we deal with this adversity? This negative feeling of not accomplishing things. Do we give up? Do we mope around about it? Do we complain that thrusters absolutely suck and we aren’t that great at them?
If the answer is yes, then congratulations you have taken the easy way out.
But there is another way,
As the cliche goes “the glass is half full” depending on your outlook. Staying positive in times of adversity determines a persons character. What kind of person they are. If you let the negative overwhelm you, you will fail miserably. Keeping your head up and staying positive is crucial to your happiness, success, improvement, friendships, the list goes on.
Some tips on staying positive:
- Make yourself small goals, several of them. Every time one is achieved that is success! Every improvement is ground gained no matter how small.
- Surround yourself with positive people. CFBB has some amazing members that help one another. If you haven’t met all of them yet you should.
- Eliminate the negative in your life. This goes with number 2. Negative people will bring you down. They don’t want you to be happy if they aren’t so they will bring you down with them, let your greatness be shown and appreciated by the people who believe you are great. Those people will last longer and you will have a partner in your success story. Pom.
- Give yourself 5 minutes. If something doesn’t go your way and its really getting to you, give yourself 5 minutes. Catch your breath, be aggravated, be pissed off, angry, upset, sad, whatever it is. Limit yourself to 5 shitty minutes, then LET IT GO. No one wants to be around you in an ugly mood for much longer.
- Pick yourself up.
You have to try again. If you sit and dwell on the recent misfortune you will stay in the funk. Find success even when it seems impossible. You can look back at number 1 for help.
- Control what you can control.
I can’t control my boss is an ass.
I can’t control there are wall balls in the WOD today.
I can’t control that it’s cold.
Do not stress over these things. They are out of your control, focus on what you can control and you will have a better chance of success.
So smile at your boss.
Do wall balls to the best of your ability, set a small goal.
Suck it up in the cold, everyone else is in it too.
Now don’t get me wrong. It’s hard. It is hard to try and stay so positive all the time, especially when it feels like the whole world is against you and anything you try and do isn’t working or it isn’t enough. All of this will pass I promise but you have to keep looking forward. So try the quick six.
- Small goals
- Positive support
- Eliminate negative sherminess
- 5 minutes then let it go
- Try again
- Control the controllable
Try it in your WODS, in your school, in your work, and in your life. It applies to all.
They were brothers … looked so much alike some thought they were twins … hard to tell them apart. Of course they were different but on the surface you didn’t notice … Not at first. After spending time with them though the subtle differences became clear … it was the way that you felt when you were around them more so than the way they looked. How you acted, decisions you made … they were altered depending on which one you were spending your time with. One you dreaded … the other you welcomed without giving it a second thought.
One was boring … you felt drained just thinking about him … he took so much from you … gave so little in return. For him it was the same thing day after day after day … it was drudgery … somehow it’s like you became brain numb and stopped thinking. It got to a point where you didn’t even want him around. He had you mindlessly rushing from one thing to another … having little time to do anything that might be fun. It’s a shame because it’s not that he was all bad … he probably meant well. It always started out alright with him … He’d make promises that he seemed to keep … he made you feel good … for a little while at least. Without warning though … over just a short period of time, things changed … it’s like he turned on you … like I said, he started taking much more than he gave. You dreaded … then loathed … then resented … then despised him. At some point it was so bad, that you couldn’t be around him anymore. He was an enemy that controlled, restricted, confined and suffocated … you learned to avoid him … ended up you just had to part ways … and while you were better for it … you felt lost … like you couldn’t think for yourself … you didn’t know what to do.
And then there was the brother. He was tricky … he kept you on your toes … he made you think. This was mostly because just about every situation was left up to you … he preferred it this way … he kept you engaged … alert … watchful. Time with him freed you up to do so many other things that you wanted to do … fun things. You didn’t seem to rush so much … forget so much. He’d make promises that he kept … and kept keeping. Being with him made you stronger and smarter. You wanted him around because you felt good when he was there. He was a friend that gave back way more than he took … and over time … you still felt good … better even …. In fact, the more time you spent together, the easier life became … after a while it was like he just became a part of you … he was just there … like breathing … a second skin. With him, life was freeing … exciting … engaging … rewarding. If you spent enough time with him, you just adopted his ways … you could become lifetime friends … You were better for it and you never felt lost … your mind was clear … you had direction.
The dreaded brother? … His name was Routine …..
Routine ate the exact same thing every day. Routine walked the same treadmill every day. Routine drove to work the same way … Routine watched the same shows … Routine read the same books or never read books at all … Routine went to sleep at the exact same time every night … Routine went to the same church service … sat in the same pew … Routine used the same words … and adopted an unchanging attitude … in fact, he was kind of prideful and wanted everyone to do it the ‘same way’ he did. Routine controlled, restricted, confined, and suffocated … His vocabulary consisted mostly of “I can’t.”
The welcomed brother? …. His name was Habit ….
Habit ate clean from a large variety. Habit chose intense, varied, functional movements. Habit rode off of the “beaten path” but still headed in the right direction. Habit tried watching documentaries and foreign films now and then, sometimes even cartoons … Habit read books that pushed him out of his comfort zone; challenged his thinking … Habit coveted his sleep making sure to get enough … Habit developed his spiritual life … sometimes outside of tradition… sitting in different pews and sometimes even on the floor. Habit learned new words … and used them … he adjusted his attitude when necessary … in fact, he was kind of humble … never demanding that everyone do things ‘his way’ … he just made his way so attractive most people wanted to. Habit made good on his promises. Habit’s life was freeing, exciting, engaging, rewarding … His vocabulary consisted mostly of “I can.”
“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.” Aristotle